Writing Task #11: A Busy Day

Look This Picture and Write your description. Here are three models of good writing as your references.

🔁 STEP 1 — Add BEFORE (Model 1)

He was running in the rain. That morning, he woke up late because his alarm did not ring. He had an important presentation at school. He was worried because he did not want to be late. The weather was bad, but he had to hurry.

✔ Sekarang ada alasan. ✔ Ada tekanan waktu.

🔁 STEP 2 — Add Emotional Turning Point (Model 3)

That morning, he woke up late because his alarm did not ring. He had an important presentation at school. He felt stressed and nervous.

While he was running in the rain, some of his papers almost fell. His heart was beating fast. He thought he would be late. Suddenly, his teacher called him and said the presentation was delayed. He felt a little relieved.

✔ Ada perubahan emosi: stressed → panicked → relieved

🔁 STEP 3 — Add AFTER (Model 2)

That morning, he woke up late because his alarm did not ring. He had an important presentation at school. He felt stressed and nervous.

While he was running in the rain, some of his papers almost fell. His heart was beating fast. He thought he would be late. Suddenly, his teacher called and said the presentation was delayed. He felt relieved.

When he finally arrived at school, he was wet but ready. In the end, his presentation went well. That busy morning taught him to prepare better next time.

✅ FINAL STRONG VERSION (8–12 Sentences | Complete)

That morning, he woke up late because his alarm did not ring. He had an important presentation at school, and he felt very nervous. The sky was cloudy, and it started to rain.

He was running fast while holding his bag and some papers. Some papers almost fell, and his heart was beating quickly. He was afraid he would arrive too late.

Suddenly, his teacher called and said the presentation would start later than planned. He felt relieved but still hurried to school. When he finally arrived, he was wet but ready. In the end, his presentation went well, and he learned to manage his time better.

🎯 Teaching Point for Blog

Bad writing: Only describe what you see.

Better writing: Explain why → show feeling change → show result.

Structure always wins: Before → Pressure → Turning Point → After → Lesson